A Matching Purse Filled with the Finest Champagne

Another ad from WTC in Causeway Bay. Presenting another must-have accessory: a purse full of champagne, to match your ever-present champagne flute. Though I have to say that i didn’t see any butlers carrying trays of refills when i was last down there. So unprofessional.

I suppose the idea is to simply dip your glass into your purse, or perhaps pour it out the side, though it looks like the latch will make that a messy proposition. Better to simply drink from it directly, ala wineskins of old, or use a straw? I hope the purse is insulated, as a mouthful of warmed champagne would ruin the whole fantasy; the additional note of hot vinyl would no doubt throw off the champagne’s delicately balanced flavors...

Evil Silken Credit Twins Humiliate the UPS Guy

I saw this billboard in Mongkok. I’ve seen this pair a few times on local TV - nearest I can figure is they’re vaguely mythical heroes who shill for a credit bureau, but of course the commercials are in Cantonese so who knows. I just found the image funny, though bizarre and vaguely disturbing as well. What exactly are they trying to portray here? And why are they humiliating a doughy UPS delivery guy by pinning him with candy-striped poles, to say nothing of forcing him to wear a paper sack over his head? What is he supposed to signify? Bad delivery services? And why are they striking martial arts poses while bedecked in matching silk suits, berets, and ties - do they have business suits under the kungfu suits? And do I really want to know?

Do You Wanna Dance with Me & My Mylar Tux?

An ad from Neway, a huge kareoke chain here. We just spent a surreal afternoon there for an impromptu going away party. The utterly bizarre and completely unrelated accompanying videos are worth the trip: the vintage 80’s hairstyle are amazing, and ‘New York New York’ featured footage of Amsterdam and the Southwest. Can’t imagine it’s hard to get footage of NYC, but I digress.

Anyway this billboard features one of the strangest tuxes I’ve ever seen - I’m guessing its paint-splattered Mylar, the same material in those silver florist balloons, but who knows? Maybe its especially space fabric designed to allow our heartthrob here to execute hyperkinetic ubermoves while crooning along with the latest cantopop schmaltz. The fabric cuts down the friction, but our hero runs a dangerous risk of collapsing from heat stroke, as the material mimics those shiny weight-loss suits on late night cable, and all that extra sweat pours down into his equally bizarre rainbow tinged reverse-winged shoes...

Tough Jeansmith Initiation?

A jeans/fashion outfit here in HK - seems to qualify to wear ‘Tough” jeans, one must first survive the initiation, which involves having both wrists tied to one ankle while fending off attackers with a claw hammer. At least they arm you, though it looks like this guy is getting the worst of it. He’s still on his feet though; just a few more minutes and he can qualify for the jean jacket combo, which I’m told involves handcuffs and industrial weed whackers...